Dr. Strangespeller or: How I Learned to Stop Transposing and Love the Spell Check

I can't spell worth a damn.

I rely on spell check the way my granny relies on her Social Security check to keep her stocked in smokes and cheap beer. So, I have been as guilty as anyone of making boneheaded spelling errors in my titles and auction body.

Most typos and misspellings just make you look unprofessional or uneducated, but when you misspell keywords, especially in your title, you set yourself up for failure.

Here are some of my favorite eBay misspellings:

• Ernest Hemingway sells quite well, but his doppelganger, Mr. Hemmingway, is underappreciated.

• A bowl and a bowel are wholly different receptacles. I don't suggest substituting one for the other.
  

• People interested in genealogy will seldom find your geneology listings.

• A crocodile is a large reptile used to make beautiful leather goods and at least two Australians famous. A crocadile is a related lizard, usually found lost in the Shoe & Accessories category.

• Ralph Lauren is a famous American designer (who's real name is Ralph Lipchitz!) Ralph Laren appears to be a maker of clothing which does not sell very well on eBay.

As you can see, this spelling business is more science than art. The search function is unforgiving and creativity in the arrangement of letters is punished harshly.

That's all for now. I'm off to enjoy a big steaming bowel of oatmeal!